My Gray Experience

Many women my age sport gray hair that looks extremely shiny and brilliant.

At the beginning of the coronavirus quarantine, I decided to stop coloring my hair as an experiment. I wanted to experience what my gray hair looked like and how would it look on me.

I had more questions for myself. Would gray hair make me look older? Will my hair look thinner? Will my scalp stand out? The only way to find out was to stop applying permanent black dye to my hair, every two weeks, and wait for the results.

The picture above was taken in late Spring 2020. I had not colored my hair for maybe three months, maybe four, or somewhere between. With box braids, I noticed the gray hair caused my scalp to look wider, which made my hair look thinner, even in braids. All I saw was scalp. I didn’t like that. I wanted my gray to make its appearance throughout my hair, all at once, evenly, covering my natural curls like a blanket. That’s how everyone else’s looked, so why not mine? I wasn’t appreciative of the patchwork and the thin-hair look on top of that.

Now, regarding everyone else’s hair, I saw on social media. I am sure it took them years to grow their hair just right. It took time to learn how to treat it. And I am sure it took time to learn to style it, and not to mention, love it. I gave the process maybe four months and I was done.
Perhaps I should give the gray hair look another shot? If I do will I look 55 or will people still think I am in my thirties? Am I afraid of that part?

I know I didn’t give the transition enough time, and I was not fair to the process. There is no way I could tell what my final color would look like in just months. I still had dye in my hair. My hair without pigment is curlier and kinkier than my pigmented strands. That part I liked. I imagine myself wearing a silver afro with black undertones and bold red lips. Wait, that image sounds nice. But do I have the patients and confidence to walk around showcasing a wide scalp while wearing box braids?

I had gray hair since I was fifteen and started dyeing my hair biweekly (because of my pixie cut) when I was in my thirties. Dyeing my hair is not a chore for me. It is part of my hair care routine. So, I guess I am not ready to go all the way to finally see my actual hair color. Perhaps in five years I will think differently, but for now, I’ll buy a box of dye in color black.

How do you feel about your gray hair and gray hair in general?